How parents can help kids handle tough losses in sports this summer

WASHINGTON (7News) — Summer sports season is here -- which means camps, tournaments, swim meets, and big emotions for young athletes.

And while losing is part of the game, how you respond in those moments can shape how kids handle life's setbacks.

Pediatric psychologist Dr. Chelsey Bowman with Children’s National Hospital said the first step starts with parents, not kids. Before reacting to a tough loss, check your emotions then offer comfort to your kid. Maybe that’s a hug. Or a few minutes alone, or taking deep breaths together.

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Bowman said parents should name and validate their kids’ emotions -- you’re angry, you’re sad, you’re disappointed - while also making it clear that poor sportsmanship is not okay.

If your kid is super competitive, shift the focus from winning to progress.

You can also set specific, controllable goals, like staying focused after a mistake.

“When we help kids think about how they are getting better each week or each day or from game to game, then there are things they can take away, and they can realize that they are winning at their own goals,” said Dr. Chelsey Bowman.

And for parents who may be a little too invested in their child’s sport, Bowman said it helps to remember what kids are really learning -- teamwork, patience, leadership, persistence, and how to keep going when things do not go their way.

She also said, “If we don’t step in and help our kids learn how to deal with losses and defeat, then how are they going to do that in school, or in their job, or in their future?”